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I admit to feeling the occasional sour grapes and want to withhold something due to spite. There’s the scene in Ghostbusters 2 (or was it 1? It’s been too long) where the mayor wants to toss the GB to the curb when they know the big bad is coming, and they keep fighting. I always felt at some point I’d say, “FINE, die in a fire why don’cha?”
Not very charitable, I’ll admit. But it’s really hard to keep going when you know you can do the job and no one will give you the chance (like, oh, being a writer.)
But recently I applied for a position/grant type of opportunity and laid out what I would do during the time I held this position, including organizing library talks, doing Banned Book Week events, organizing NaNoWriMo events, and informing writers on digital media, their rights, Creative Commons, etc.
I didn’t get the position.
Ever since the winner was announced (and I’ve been placed on the organization’s mailing list because apparently applying for the position is the “opt in” to their list) I get all bitter and small and mean. I’m being honest here, not proud.
But then today I realized, what’s to stop me from doing all that anyway? I don’t have the credentials or the grant, so it would be harder to organize, but what if I contacted the library to let them know I’d love to talk about CC, or start a kids’ writing group, or do something with my skills for the community? I don’t need the label to do the work, and if I honestly thought I could help people out, then why did I need the shiny tiara power of the position to do so? (I don’t think the winner of the grant got a tiara. At least I hope not. Just using it as an example.)
At some point it might be good to grow up and let the gut spite reactions go.
Not sure if this is about writing or not, but as the position was literary in nature, it applies to me.
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6 Responses to Sour Grapes and Spite
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Word, Mur. I think this applies to real working writing. Sometimes you won’t get the gig. Got to rise up and get past it. Also, sometimes the gig will be The Perfect Paragraph or A Favorite Story Sold. Getting spiteful probably doesn’t help us keep writing.
Maybe we could all take up a collection and get you a tiara. Then you could wear it over to the other person’s office and do the nanny-nanny-boo-boo dance (lol) . . . I know exactly how you feel though…good post.
I understand your desire to do these wonderful things in spite of losing out on the position, but if I understand the role correctly, you’d be getting monetary compensation if you had got it.
Time is money, especially for writers, so if you’re taking the time out it affects your finances. I’m all for helping others, but not if it’s affecting your ability to provide for your family.
I don’t think your grapes are that sour after all.
Do it! Do it!!! And you will get the shiny tiara anyway! A better one!!!
Then again, the high road is a little crowded. You have a lot to offer. As you will remember, in the classically referenced Ghostbusters, after the guys were kicked to the curb, they were called upon to save the day. Let the library get covered in Stay-Puff marshmallow goo – you can save the day with your podcast and writing. Go Eagle Go!
“what’s to stop me from doing all that anyway?”
Hey… yeah. What IS stopping me? Must ponder this.
Oh, and my sour-grapes “nemesis” just got a huge write-up in an alumni magazine with a full-page glamour photo…
I’m trying to be the bigger person, but it’s really really hard. I kinda want to burn the magazine in effigy.